Is a friends with benefits relationship right for you?If you’re thinking about entering into a friends with benefits relationship, there are five key points to keep in mind that’ll help you determine if this casual connection is truly beneficial for you in every respect.1.Or if this casual connection is preventing you from putting yourself out there and going after the kind of committed relationship you see for yourself in the long-term, your FWB connection is anything but beneficial.In a few days, I’m going to Cuba on vacation with a guy I’ve been sleeping with for eight years, but whom I've never once called my boyfriend.And in addition to protecting your physical health, it’s important that you protect your emotional health by understanding that your FWB relationship can end at any time and for any reason. And while you may enjoy hooking up and being intimate, these types of relationships can only be successful if you’re both completely content with the arrangement.For instance, if your FWB relationship makes you happy in the moment but then later fills you with regret and disappointment, it’s not the right choice for you.
In fact, either of you is free to date more people, have other FWB relationships and/or play the field as much as you’d like. In order for a FWB relationship to work out, it has to fulfill your needs as well as his or hers.
So what is it about the friends with benefits dynamic that is more sustainable, and often more transparent, than an actual relationship? They’re like: How can you have sex with the same person, again and again, without falling in love?
Or at least, without getting super-jealous and –esque?
Once, he told me this long, complicated story about an affair he had with his cousin, adding, “That’s not something I tell most people.” Probably wise on his part, but I loved that story, as problematic as it may be, because I loved knowing something about him that no one else did.
Sometimes it feels like we are more honest with our friends with benefits than we are with our partners.